Welcome and thank you for stopping by. Since I stopped working on my hobby a few months ago, my friends have encouraged me to share my love of organization, home projects, inspiration and kindness. Ok! I can do that. Buckle yourselves in peeps because this post is about inspiration, kindness and how life and work intersect.
Background:
My
parents raised me to work hard, enjoy life, spread love and kindness as often
as possible to those you know as well as to complete strangers. It can be
through a simple act of opening a door for someone or a “hello” in passing all
the way to giving of your time to benefit someone other than yourself. This has
not only how I was raised, but also ingrained in my DNA. I live for and love to
help people. It’s the driver that inspires my personal life, but also in my daily
work for my employer.
I
have a degree in Accounting and Human Resources so my life is understanding the
world of business and helping people to be the best that they can be as well as to reach
their highest potential at work. I love numbers but I realized early in my
career that I cannot sit behind a desk crunching numbers all day. I was given
the opportunity to work in Human Resources when “Human Resources” was a new “thing”
in the business world. It was previously called, “Personnel”. I’ve seen Human
Resources evolve from a strictly administrative function to a strategic partner
aligning people resources to business goals. FINALLY! I can blend my love of
numbers with my passion for people! That brings me to today……
Work
Insertion with Life:
This
week started off with a Human Resources conference where we talked about a
number of different initiatives to help us drive our business into the future.
On Sunday as I was getting into “it’s time to get back to work" mode, I felt a
level of excitement to gather with my big broad HR team and hammer out some really
great ideas. I must admit, I thought it was going to be solely talking about
the work for the next year only. To my pleasant surprise it was SO much more! I
left with such a positive and optimistic feeling because our team is focusing
on the human aspect of Human Resources. To me, that means building strong
relationships, showing genuine compassion, getting to know people on a deeper
level, and inspiring great acts of good through kindness and understanding. Work
is now incredibly aligned with my life. What happened this week is a perfect example……
Inspiration
through Compassion:
My
husband Jim is going to school to get his Master’s degree. This has given me
the opportunity to focus on me. I crave activities that feed my soul so what
started as a venture to simply fill the void and cure my boredom turned into a
journey that I am now sharing with you. This is the first (and only) time I am
telling this story. It is very personal, but has forever changed my life.
In
thinking about the options to fill my time, I could have focused on being a
little selfish for once. Then I thought of my mom who passed away a few years
ago. She was the most amazing, loving, caring and compassionate woman in the
world to me. My best friend! I wanted to do something that would make her
proud, but also to help me grow in a very personal way. It turns out that I
grew in love and found a way to be more human.
One
of the volunteer activities I decided to do was to spend time with people in a
nursing home. That is where I met Estelle. Miss Estelle is 87 years old with a
sharp and fantastic mind. I would visit her once a week to talk, read to her, listen
to her favorite music and hear about what life had taught her. One day she
asked if I could visit more. I knew at that very moment that we were becoming
fast friends. Undoubtedly, my answer was yes. Over the months we spent together I found
that I was visiting her three times a week. I would leave work excited in the
fact that I was going to be visiting a very lonely and sick lady that was
getting joy just from me sitting with her, holding her hand and listening to
stories of her life.
Estelle
had a very sad past, of which I will not share out of respect for her. The one
thing that I will share is that her children had basically dropped her off at
the nursing home and visited once a week for a month and then
disappeared altogether. Estelle was craving the love and closeness of family
because she said that she did not want to die alone. I made a decision in my
mind at that very moment and committed that she would not die alone if I could
help it. Estelle’s stories of her life inspired me to unleash all of the
compassion I have in my heart. She was very much like my mother. I realized
that Estelle was helping me as much as I was helping her.
A
Special Bond:
Whenever
I arrived at her door, Estelle lit up like it was Christmas Day when I said, “How’s
my best girl today?” I would bring her a little something each time that she
loved and sometimes a sweet treat. Her favorite was Hershey’s chocolate, which
happened to be mom’s favorite candy as well. Whenever we talked, it felt like
we had been a member of each other’s family. She would say things like, “Oh!
That was something wasn’t it? Just like your Uncle Joe.” I wouldn’t correct her
because it was obvious that she thought I was family. That’s what she was
craving and I was humbled and proud that she would think of me that way. Even
if her mind was deteriorating and she thought I was someone else, I didn’t
care. We started to form a special bond.
It
makes me sad that life is so hurried these days. We often forget to take time
to connect with people on a deeper level to get to know them in a more personal
way. Being human is about interaction, relationships and connections. Estelle
was teaching me to slow down and enjoy the simple things in life.
Coming
Close to the End:
Over
the last month, Estelle appeared to be getting frailer. She always had her wits
about her though. She was one sharp cookie! As we talked and listened to her
favorite music, she said to me, “I think I’m coming close to the end.” I just
smiled at her and said, “No! You’re going to be ready to play outside soon if
it ever gets warm.” Estelle would squeeze my hand and smile.
Every
time I visited after that, Estelle said something that was referencing the end
of her life. The last time was yesterday when she said, “I think I’m ready.” I
didn’t feel sad when she said that because she was excited to see her family
that had gone before her. The one thing that tore at my heart and made my eyes
well up with tears was when she said, “You’ll be with me won’t you?” I said, “Absolutely…..”
The
Notice I was Dreading:
I
was working away today at the office and my phone started vibrating. I didn’t
think much of it at first because I get work calls all the time on my cell. I
recognized the number. It was the nursing home. My heart sunk in my chest. On
the other end was a nurse telling me that Estelle had taken a turn for the
worse last night and they did not think she would make it through the early
evening. All I could think of was getting to her and fulfill the promise I made to her.
As
I was driving home, I began talking out loud to my mom in heaven. I asked her
if she would be with me and greet Estelle as she crossed over. A bit of emotion
came over me because I was reaching out to mom and asking her to take the next
step in caring for this lovely woman. Even though mom had passed away a few
years ago, I found myself coming to her for help and guidance to get me through
this.
I
stopped at the flower shop before arriving at my house. There I found pink
carnations. Estelle told me that those are her favorite flowers. Another
similarity to my mom because those were mom’s favorite as well. When I arrived
home, I put on a red dress shirt and a tie. Estelle’s favorite color was red
and I wanted to make sure that she had two of her favorite things.
When
I walked into her room today she looked so different than she did the day before.
She was half alert and half asleep. It was the pain medication relaxing her so
that she would more easily transition. I sat there holding her hand and talking
to the nurse for a while. Another nurse came in and looked at her evaluating her
vital signs. The nurse came over and bent down to whisper, “We’re getting very
close.” My heart sunk because when my mom passed, we had to shut the machines
off that were keeping her alive. All of the sudden I was back in mom’s hospital
room with the same feeling. I thought to myself, “This is not about you or mom.
This is about Estelle!” I needed to be fully present!
I
whispered in Estelle’s ear, “It’s okay. Go to your family.” I kissed her on the
forehead and said, “I love you Miss Estelle. I’m a better person for knowing
you. God bless you……” It was not too long after that when she passed. I kept my
promise to her that she would not die alone. The feelings that I had taken away from this experience is being thankful for this wonderful teaching me to be more human and allowing me to listen to her, and be fully present so that the focus was solely on her.
Be
(more) human:
I
cried with the nurse and said goodbye. Estelle has forever changed me. I am a
better person because of her. I learned that giving of myself, being
compassionate and listening to someone who needed an ear was a simple part of what
it takes to be a good human being. I am going to focus on the lessons I have
learned this week to help shape a better me.
People
need to slow down, take time for others, be compassionate and present. Think
about how the world could transform into a much better place. It does not cost
a cent to do these things and the benefit is so great!
Be
(more) human my friends!
Thank
you for stopping by!
Sean
I have disabled comments being visible to others. I will reach out to you directly if you want to talk more about this. Thank you for understanding.
I have disabled comments being visible to others. I will reach out to you directly if you want to talk more about this. Thank you for understanding.
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